And the Lord’s servant must not be quarrelsome but must be kind to everyone, able to teach, not resentful.
In this post on his blog canon fodder, Dr. Michael J. Kruger, reflects on five characteristics of Ted Lasso’s leadership style. Ted Lasso is the main, fictional character in an AppleTV show called Ted Lasso. It was a helpful and insightful post and I thought that each of the five leadership characteristics that Dr. Kruger reflects on are so vitally important to any form of leadership that they were worth exploring in more detail, especially as they pertain to our roles as husbands and fathers.
So, in this post, I wanted to focus on the first characteristic: Kindness.
In his post, Dr. Kruger rightly observes that most people expect their leaders to be egotistical bullies in order to coerce others into doing what they want. Too often, as a husband and father, I resort to demanding what I want from my family rather than responding with kindness. I use my irritation with something small as a justification for the way I act. If my kids aren’t doing their chores when I ask them to, I may feel like my authority is not being respected and respond with anger. If my wife is interrupting me at work, I may feel like she doesn’t care about my responsibilities and respond with irritation.
Putting kindness at the forefront of our minds can be a powerful way to change the way we approach everyday life. Being kind is an active choice that we can make when interacting with others. A kind heart seeks to put others’ needs above their own. Kindness demands that we humble ourselves and take the time to invest in someone else. Taking the time to let someone else know that you care or to listen and truly hear them is a powerful witness for the Gospel.
To use the examples from earlier, if I were to set aside my need to feel like I’m performing well at my job or the need to feel like my kids respect my authority I could take advantage of an opportunity to show, more effectively, that I love and care for them. It would also show them that I care more about them and their needs than my own.
My prayer for myself and my brothers-in-Christ is to be able to set ourselves aside so that we can show kindness not only to those we love but also to those we don’t think deserve it.